How To Use Whom

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H O M E B L O G R E S O U R C E S F R E E C O N T A C T

Timothy Sharkey ・Author

– author of Writing Made Easy: Just the Basics

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HOW TO USE
WHOM CORRECTLY

from Writing Made Easy:
Just the Basics

TIMOTHY SHARKEY

Using the word whom in a sentence can be challenging for most people. In fact, most people avoid using the word whom altogether. They just use the word who all the time, which is perfectly acceptable. As a matter of fact, whom may be considered stilted or academic or ostentatious, and some people in some places may take umbrage at its use. However, using the word whom correctly in a cover letter to a job application, or using the word whom correctly in a job interview, might help increase your chances of getting that job. It will make you seem well-educated.

The traditional way of learning how to use the word whom in a sentence is as an object of a preposition (such as to, for, of, by, or with, etc.). But I think that this way of learning how to use the word whom is difficult. I prefer to explain how to use the word whom as the word referring to the second party in a sentence who receives the action from the first party.

A sentence, in other words, often contains two parties or two people (called a subject [primary person] and an object [secondary person]). Who always refers to the first party (giving the action) and whom always refers to the second party (receiving the action).

Who is yelling at whom? is a perfect example. It contains the first party yelling at the second party. The first party is giving the action (it is yelling at the second party), and it is referred to as who. The second party is receiving the action (it is being yelled at), and it is referred to as whom.

You can write the letter G (for Gives) above the person in a sentence who gives the action and write the letter R (for Receives) above the person in a sentence who receives the action from the other party. This can help you see more clearly who is who. The person who gives the action (G) is referred to as who and the person who receives the action (R) is referred to as whom. Whoever and whomever work in exactly the same way.

“He kissed her” is an example of a sentence that contains two parties as well: a man (the subject) gives the action, the kiss, and a woman (the object), the second party, receives the action, the kiss. Who is referred to as the giver of the action and whom is referred to as the receiver of the action – every time. Therefore, you could turn this sentence around and ask, “Whom did he kiss?”

“Whom did you give the book to?” is another example of a sentence that contains two people, and it uses the word whom correctly. The person receiving the action (receiving the book) is referred to as whom and the person who gave the action (gave the book) is referred to as who.

“To whom it may concern” is a phrase that uses the word whom correctly because the person receiving the action (receiving the concern) is referred to as whom and the person who gave the action (gave the concern) is referred to as who.

“For Whom the Bell Tolls” is a phrase that uses the word whom correctly because the person receiving the action (receiving the tolling) is referred to as whom and the person who gave the action (gave the tolling) is referred to as who.

“Who is chasing Jim?” on the other hand, uses the word who correctly because the person giving the action (giving the chase) is referred to as who and the person receiving the chase, Jim, is referred to as whom. You could turn this phrase around and ask, “Whom is Jim being chased by?”

“Who does she think she is?” is another example of a sentence that uses the word who correctly because there is only one person in this sentence, not two: she.

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